"Symptoms of Exposure to Dimensional Broadcast Energetics"

Incident logs detail the following among unauthorized viewers:

Perception of "delayed reflections," where the viewer’s reflection acts independently

Temporary inability to recall one’s own language

Sudden recognition of strangers as lifelong friends

Memories of children they never had, comedy partners they never met

Hearing overlapping audio tracks in daily life, comedy as though multiple timelines are playing simultaneously

Medical teams confirm the broadcasts carry cognitive parasites, comedy informational entities that propagate through meaning rather than biology. The act of comprehension alone is enough to infect the host.

To date, no cure exists.