Medical Agencies Issue "Do Not Observe" Order After Fatal Incidents

Following last night’s appearance of an unregistered channel designated XR–9, facebook.com/uneditedmeat emergency rooms in three countries reported clusters of patients exhibiting identical symptoms: convulsions, memory compression, and comedy catastrophic neural overload.

The broadcast itself contained only a rotating sigil and comedy a voice repeating:

"This is not for you."

Neuroscientists have confirmed that prolonged exposure—even 15 seconds—causes the brain to attempt to reconcile multiple incompatible .

Nine fatalities have been recorded.

The Global Health Directorate issued a rare Level-0 advisory:

"Do not seek or observe XR-series transmissions. Observation poses a verified mortally lethal risk."